Month: July 2013

My husband just got off the phone with the surgeon and Tank did great in surgery.  His chest x-ray was totally clear so that was a huge blessing.  He said he is really groggy but had been awake and starting to move around some.  After waiting what felt like DAYS it was so good to hear that he was going to be ok.  He is probably going to stay until Wednesday which I think I am ok with. If he was a smaller dog I might feel differently but I am afraid one of us is going to hurt him in our efforts to try to help him get around.  One more night in the surgery center will hopefully allow him a little more adjustment time.  Anyway, just wanted to update you guys and let you know that Tank is indeed a Tripawd 🙂

So today is Tanks last day with 4 legs.  I am trying so hard to be positive… but my heart is breaking.  He is licking his hurt leg a lot so I know he knows something is wrong, but I am struggling with the fact that he can’t possibly imagine what is really about to happen!

I have read on this site that they need us to be strong and that they will feed off our worry but WOW, that is so hard to do.  I am terrified something might happen in surgery, terrified they will find cancer in his lungs when they do the x-ray tomorrow, terrified that he will be unhappy with his new life and blame us.  I know I am preaching to the choir here but he just means so much to my family.  He has really be the absolute best dog ( even though he ate our couch and too many pillows to count) 🙂  and it just isn’t fair for him to have to go through this!!  My husband complains all the time about our kids playing the “fair card” but in this situation it JUST ISN”T FAIR!!!  I just want him to come home, wag his tail, lick my face and show me that we did the right thing!!!  Until then I will continue to smile on the outside and cry on the inside.

Good Morning!  I have finally decided that writing about how I am feeling might be helpful.  Right now I am busy just trying to live in denial that this is happening to my Tank!  Tank is my 5 year old brindle Great Dane, and he is the best thing that has ever happened to my family.  He is the first “ours” that my husband and I have had together ( both have children from previous marriages) and the fact that he is getting ready to go through this is absolutely killing me!  His story starts the same as many of yours:

We noticed a small lump on his front left foot about 6 weeks ago.  We have another dog ( Harley) and we assumed that they had played too hard on the stairs and that he sprained it or something.  Went to Vet and he gave us anti-inflammatory drugs and said lets give it a week or two.  Went back a couple weeks later and did an x-ray.  Didn’t see anything and so we did another round of anti- inflammatory drugs while we were out of town on vacation.  Got home and the lump was significantly bigger so we knew something was really wrong.

Tank saw Dr. Lange about three weeks ago and he recommended a biopsy which was horrible for us.  Tank basically came home in a cast and looked so sad 🙁  It was a much more intense procedure than we had anticipated.  Took a week to get results back and now here we are with the diagnosis of bone cancer and the best option amputation.  I have spent days pouring over this site and it has been really helpful.  We are busy getting the house ready and trying to make sure he is comfortable and happy this weekend.  He is limping but doesn’t seem to be in too much pain yet so that is good.

Basically I have been in “business” mode about this but my heart is breaking.  Why is this happening to my sweet boy??  He is such a puppy at heart and just has so much life in him!  I haven’t been too open with my friends/family because I know that there are probably people out there who think this is wrong.  Tank is a tall dog ( but lean which is good) and the thought of him trying to get around on three legs is terrifying.  But.. he is so young, so happy, and so full of life and I know that he is not anywhere near ready for the other option!  But wow… am I ready for this??  I am so worried.   I am doubting everything about myself right now.  I am not sure I am emotionally strong enough for this and it is scaring me.  I have read tons of blogs, looked at tons of pictures, and I know that many people have been in my shoes but it still is scary me to death.  I don’t want him to wake up wondering why we did this to him!  I don’t want him to not be “Tank” and I know the meds will make him “off”.  I just want my boy to be ok and for this to be the right thing to be doing!  Ugg… this weekend I am going to be a mess.  I just want him to be better already so that I know it was all ok and that he did fine.  The waiting and thinking is so hard!!! This is Tank and Harley earlier this summer